So you consider yourself a man?

By NICK VILLALOBOS
Columnist

Alright, fellow male students, listen up and listen well.

In the words of Batman from ‘Superman v Batman,’ the new movie that hits theaters this week, “It’s time you learn what it means to be a man.”

First some context: I am informing men about what it means to be a man, because a lot of you have grown up to be only pampered swine, or spoiled pigs for those of you who don’t know what that means.

You have looked at women with nothing but lust in your eyes. You tell yourselves “oh she’s hot” or “oh she looks easy,” and by doing that, you have given yourself a social status that is no higher than that of a pig. Well actually, even a pig might be too high of status for you, but for the sake of this article, that’s what I will compare you too.

So now that the foundation of the problem has been established, it’s time to fix your filth.

The first step that would move you closer to being a man is to make sure Jesus is who your striving to be like, and not the character from ‘The Walking Dead,” but the one who died for you and me.

In order to do that I encourage you to plug into a church, or pick up a Bible and start reading in the New Testament, then constantly pray to Him.

The next step [if you’re still reading after getting a face full of truth in step one] is to quit looking at women with the idea of dominance, violence, physical strength or sex on the mind.

Instead look at not just women, but everyone, with the ideas of empathy, kindness, compassion and love on your mind. If you did step one correctly, then this step would be no issue for you to accomplish.

The final step of becoming a man [if you’re still reading], is to ultimately quit looking for one to call your own.

I know that one might have made your eyes bleed as you read it, but yet again it’s the truth and sometimes the truth hurts, especially if it’s that of the good Lord above.

What I mean by the final step, is that if your heart is in the right place with Jesus at its core, you have a sense of compassion, love, empathy and kindness in your mind, instead of their exact opposites, then there would be no need to look because the Lord will provide you with exactly the right woman.

So men, to tie a bow on it all, get your hearts right, minds right, be patient and let everything fall into place. If you do that, then you might just crawl from the status of a pig and also receive not what you always wanted, but what you always needed in terms of a woman.