By ALLISON RUWALDT
Over the years, Gen Z has become increasingly lonely, but at the same time, has more ways than ever to connect.
The Gen Z loneliness epidemic is something that is heavily spoken about, mostly by digital creators. Personally, I have seen plenty of think pieces, blogs, and video essays explaining the phenomenon; however, I hardly see people in my everyday life trying to change this norm.
An obvious cause of new age loneliness is advancements in technology and social media. Phones, more specifically social media, have become a central part of the Gen Z cultural identity. It essentially grew up with us, and because of that, it has engraved itself into almost everyone’s lives.
While having a way to connect with anyone anywhere is a positive, the excessiveness of it has harmed real-life socialization standards. I have had so many instances where I texted someone big news, or posted a rant on a private story, but then I would see the same friend in real life and not have anything to talk to them about. The conversation becomes more repetitive because the discussion has been had, but the connection never formed.
While this does not always happen, it is a contributing factor in why we as a generation feel so disconnected. Another factor has been the erasure of small talk. I’ve heard people say countless times that they hate small talk, but small conversations are the first steps to connection.
In my opinion, younger people get frustrated with small talk more, because they long for connection so deeply. They want to skip the pleasantries and rush to the connection, usually because they are used to the instant gratification that they get from social media. So many see small talk as useless interaction, but in reality, those small moments are what build the base of a relationship.
Social media has also made Gen Z culture more parasocial. Parasocial describes a relationship, usually between a celebrity and a fan, where the fan feels like they know the celebrity on a personal level, when in actuality, they do not.
I have had so many conversations asking if someone knows another person, and they will respond with something along the lines of “no, but we follow each other.” On another side of that, I have plenty of old friends that I do not speak with regularly, but I still feel like I am updated on their lives because I see what they post.
As much as I hate to admit it, though, I know that liking someone’s Instagram story is not enough of an interaction to build a strong relationship. However, it is so much easier and less intimidating to just leave a comment or like than it is to go up to someone intentionally and ask how they are.
Everyone is so scared of someone responding poorly or embarrassing themselves somehow that they are too scared to try. It is important to remember, though, that anyone you strike up a conversation with is also a part of this culture. Simple things like asking someone how their day is going, complimenting more people, or even just saying hello can help shift the culture socially.
Next time you are in class, instead of just looking away from that person you made eye contact with, say good morning or ask how they are. Although we are all incredibly different, some things universally unite us, and wanting connection will always be one of them.