Dear DJ

Dear DJ

I’ve suspected that my boyfriend has been fooling around, and when confronted with the evidence, he denied everything and said it would never happen again. Should I just let it go?

Seriously, Single/Not Single

Dear Single/Not Single:

It is easy to see where you are coming from. Trust and Communication are the most important factors in any committed relationship, whether it be between partners, co-workers, friends, and family. Humans are a very social creature and without trust we can’t socialize and paranoia sets in. When you allow yourself to enter a new relationship you open yourself up to be hurt. Everyone in life will end up hurting you, but it is up to you to figure out who is worth the pain. Before answering your question, you must ask yourself, is there a reason for the mistrust? Could it be a past relationship that makes you believe he could be doing the same thing? Insecurities? If you believe the mistrust comes from an outside source perhaps talking with him about these issues and coming up with a plan to help you build confidence. However, if you have seen him or he has done something to warrant the mistrust then it’s in another field. Trust is very hard to gain back once it is lost. You must ask yourself, can you trust him again? If you see him with another female like a classmate are your thoughts “Is it her?” The Paranoia will eventually consume you to the point any future relationships could become jeopardize. Look yourself in the mirror and try and visualize yourself with him, do you believe you will be able to trust him again? Will you be able to let me go out with “the guys” and not wonder if there is another girl with them. Is he worth the pain?

If you would like your question answered by DJ, please submit your questions to nwnews@nwosu.edu. Some times a third party response can help you!