By CAITLIN GOODY, Student Reporter
Finals are here and so being the last hints to college dating. Last week we discussed avoiding U-Hauling, not neglecting your friends, not going in with the intention of “fixing” someone, making time for yourself and how mind games are only for players.
These last four hints aren’t only some of the best, one got the people’s choice award for most approved.
- Be careful about letting friendships develop into more.
“We see all these movies about soul-mates that we get wrapped up in finding our own,” said Rachel, a Northwestern Junior, “we have to be a little more discerning than that.” While we may be compatible and comfortable with those people, the state of the relationship completely changes when you try and turn it into something more. If you don’t stay together, then you may be sacrificing a friendship completely by dating that person. The relationship may be wonderful, but you should distinguish that before you do anything to alter the course of that friendship.
- If it didn’t work out the first time, it probably won’t ever work out.
There is always that one couple who breaks up and gets back together nearly as often as they change outfits. (Think Sam and Ronnie from Jersey Shore.) Regardless of how they feel about each other at the time, the underlying problems are always there, waiting to cause another scene. When you break up with someone, you should do so knowing that you will not get back together with that person, especially if they commit one of the major deal-breakers: verbal or physical abuse, cheating on you, etc. None of those things are okay, and you should never accept them by returning to the person who wronged you in the first place.
However, break-ups don’t always mean the end. We’re in college after all, we’re still figuring out what we want in this world. Sometimes, a break may be needed for each of you to grow.
- If you aren’t in a relationship, worry about something else.
There are plenty of perks to being single, and even if you do have someone who catches your eye, you should direct your energy toward other things: keeping your grades up, getting involved in things you love and bettering yourself as a human being. Work on accomplishing your goals that don’t focus entirely on other people. “Being single for most of college has allowed me to experience different things,” said Katie, Senior. “I’ve been able to travel and meet all kinds of people that I might not have, if I were in a relationship.”
Last but certainly not least. The people’s choice award goes to our final hint!
- Don’t place all your self-worth in the relationship.
You are worth more than simply who you are with (said practically every mom in the world). A relationship can be great, but it isn’t everything that makes up who you are, and you should remember that. Regardless of whether you are with someone, you still have a lot to offer, and your happiness shouldn’t hinge entirely on how one person feels about you.
That concludes the freshman 15 guide for college dating. Remember, in a relationship or not, don’t forget to be you. You don’t have to change to get somebody to like you. People will come and go, so keep your friends close and don’t be afraid to go on dates with somebody who’s “not your type”.