KAYLEE HARRIS
Columnist
Sexual violence is a problem our campus has recently become all too aware of. In the wake of an event like the recent rape arrest on campus, we ask ourselves what measures should be taken to better educate people to prevent more violence of this type.
The answers to questions like this are never clear. One thing that can be said is that our current approach isn’t working. Women are told to avoid certain things that men can usually enjoy without fear. If a woman makes the mistake of being too comfortable in her situation and is attacked, society will invariably place some of that blame on her shoulders.
Unfortunately, sexual assault is not uncommon for college-aged students. The Cleveland Rape Crisis Center website offers some chilling statistics. According to the CRCC, one in four women will be the victims of sexual violence during their academic career. Many men don’t consider having sexual contact with a woman who is intoxicated to be rape.
Why are we not holding seminars and teaching classes about what consent really is? Why, when we hear of an incident of sexual violence, is the first question we ask about what the victim was doing? No means no, even if she is drunk or wearing a short skirt. The “boys will be boys” attitude that our society has toward sexual assault is damaging and insulting.
Because the question of what consent is isn’t being answered, let me lay it out for you. Intoxication is not consent, end of story. If someone says “no,” don’t assume they are just playing hard to get. If at any point during sex your partner says stop, you need to stop. As a golden rule, if you aren’t absolutely sure that someone wants to be sexually involved with you, then you need to respect them and their right to their own body.
When we start educating people on what the meaning of consent is, and when society as a whole decides to stop blaming victims and help them heal instead, we will see a decline in sexual abuse. The rules of consent should never be unclear because they are so very simple.
To victims of sexual assault I will say this: it is not your fault, and you are not alone. Talk to someone who is qualified to help you. Trauma is trauma, and you owe it to yourself to take care of yourself, physically and mentally. Northwestern offers free counseling and there is no shame in taking advantage of that.
If you would like to report sexual assault or misconduct, contact Title IV coordinator Calleb Mosberg at 580-327-8415 and campus police at 580-213-3130. If you need someone to talk to, contact the Northwestern Oklahoma State University counseling center at 580-327-8439.